I am grateful that I don’t have, and have never had, the compulsion to binge every day. I am grateful that I do not have bulimia or anorexia. I am grateful that I can access and afford the psychological help that I evidently need. I am grateful that, even though I binged tonight for the first time in about 1.5 weeks, my binges seem to be less severe these days. They are still binges and still physically and emotionally damaging but, when I compare them to my worst binges, I can see that progress has been made.
I just started seeing a new psych. She is already helping me but I have realised that the sooner I start treatment with an ED specialist, the better. I’ll get on that tomorrow.
In the meantime there is television, rumination and slumber.